When Death Knocks

When death knocks, will you let him in? Or will you choose the window of life?

Beloved, things rarely go the way I plan. Do you find that in your life also?

Just as I had determined I would share my daily Bible study with you for your encouragement, God took me elsewhere and it has been some time since I've been able to spend an hour in study let alone process and write. So here I am, a little worse for the wear, a little wiser for the pain.

For as long as I've been a Christian, my family has abhorred my faith. Praise God, my mother trusted Jesus on her deathbed and the Lord has assured me she rests in heaven now.

My sister and I were inseparable as children. In our differences we completed one another. I liked the hamburger, she ate the fries. She liked the chocolate coating and I liked the vanilla ice cream on a Laddie Bar. She liked the yolks, I ate the egg whites.

Because of our differences we were at odds as adults. She detested my faith and would change the subject or make excuses to cut a call short whenever I mentioned the name of Jesus. As she got older she became paranoid and reclusive.

I prayed for many years for Jane to come to faith in Christ. Then she became ill a couple years ago and continued to decline, refusing medical evaluation or help. A few months ago, I drove 600 miles to see her. Jane's husband wouldn't let me in. I was utterly devastated and at that point I gave up all hope of her salvation or ever seeing her again.

As I prayed one morning, I released her. I told God I wasn't going to bother Him with my incessant pleas for her salvation anymore, but that I would just have to trust that He knows what's best and I'm done fighting for her when she clearly doesn't care. Wouldn't you know, just as God always does, He threw a curve ball my way.

I got a call one day from a friend I'd known since I was eleven years old. I hadn't seen Michelle for nearly forty years. She said she'd been trying to reach my sister who never answers her phone. I informed Michelle that Jane was quite ill and likely dying and that I'd given up hope of ever seeing or hearing from her again. I was grieving and felt for all intents and purposes, my sister was already dead to me.

Michelle had quite a different view. She insisted we continue to pray for Jane and asked if we could pray together weekly by phone so I agreed. I began to pray for Jane with renewed fervor, fueled by Michelle's attitude and encouragement.

A couple weeks after Michelle and I had been praying for Jane, I suddenly got a text message from an unfamiliar number which simply said, "I love you." I wrote back, "Do I love you back?" After no reply, I wrote, "I'm sorry, I don't recognize the number." She wrote, "Jane." I quickly texted back with my heart racing, "Yes! I do love you back!"

I didn't hear from her again for several days and then, "Please pray, the pain is excruciating."

I wrote, "I have been praying continuously. Hang in there. Will pray now."

This was a big step for her - she's asking me to pray to my Lord whom she's rejected!

God gave me a picture of her condition and I felt she was near the end. But I didn't want her to despair. I asked God what I should say to her and He gave very specific instructions. I wrote to her, "God has given me instruction for you. Are you willing to hear and obey?"

She wrote back, "yes."

I nearly fainted. "The Holy Spirit will take you through your life and show you those you need to forgive. You'll need to search deep and go a long way back and be willing to find forgiveness in your heart for all whom you've resented, hated or wished ill. Confess them to God and ask His forgiveness. Can you do that?"

"Yes," she said.

I then told her I would give her some time with this and to get back to me when she was ready.

She was silent a couple days and then wrote that the pain was getting worse and needed me to pray harder.

"Sometimes it gets worse before it gets better," I said, as I was thinking, God will take you home and it will be better forever. No more sorrow, no more pain. But I couldn't yet ask her to trust in Jesus because I know her so well, I knew she would feel I was pushing her and would shut me out again. I was walking on very thin ice. "God is with you. He has surrounded you with holy angels who are holding you up before Him."

"I don't need presence, I need assistance." she wrote.

"I know it's hard," I wrote, "I can't imagine the pain you suffer, I'd bear it for you if I could. Please don't lose hope, I know God is at work in you." Then I fired off a number of Scripture verses.

Silence.

The next day early, Jane wrote, "I'm better today. I actually slept last night."

Meanwhile, Michelle has also been texting Jane messages of encouragement. She sent her a Bible and texted the gospel message to her, something like, "it's simple. Just believe on the name of Jesus and trust Him as your Savior and He will forgive all your sins and you will have a place with Him in heaven for all eternity."

She wrote back, "I believe."

Michelle and I wept and praised God together.

Michelle seemed certain God would hear our prayers and heal Jane for the incredible testimony she might share. God, in His infinite mercy, had other plans.

I got the call Sunday afternoon, June 5th, 2011. It came from one of my nephews who said, "if you want to see my mom before the end, you need to come now." She had been admitted by ambulance and found to be infected with cancer in every organ and cell.

We couldn't get a flight out so my brother and I jumped in the car and drove the 600 miles again to Omaha and went straight to the hospital.

We arrived at about 5:30 AM to find that my sister had left this world around 11 PM the night before. The nurses were very thoughtful and kept Jane in her room so we could see her one last time. She wore a Mona Lisa smile on her porcelain-like face. She reminded me of a China doll.

I am certain she rests with our Lord.

He who began the work in her was faithful to complete it (Phil. 1:6.) Even when death is at the door, there is always a last minute opportunity to turn to Christ, because His compassion is great and His mercies are new every morning (Lam. 3:22-23.) and He loves us so much He died for us (John 3:16.)

When death knocks, for those who trust in Jesus, the door remains closed. Death has no power, no welcome, no entry. Jesus takes His beloved and leads them through the window of heaven to reside with Him forevermore.

Praise You sweet Jesus, God's wonderful son,
Taking my sins on like they were Your own.
Thank You my Lord that this cold heart of stone,
Has melted with love and is headed for home.

Praise for the Spirit, who leads me Your way,
Who steers me on course every time that I stray.
Thank You for guiding me day after day,
Recalling Your Scriptures in all that I say.

Praise for my Father, who's holy and true,
Creator and Savior, there's none, God, like You.
You're the paper, the picture, the scissors, and glue,
Thank You for mercy in all that You do.

We know we're not worthy, we're humbled in faith,
We're empty and useless like smelly old waste.
You fill up our hearts with Your infinite grace,
And somehow transform us, reflecting Your face.

Let us walk in Your ways, let us Speak of Your love,
Let us honor Your holiness, glory above,
Let us pour finest oil on Your head and Your feet,
Let the scent of our prayers be an incense so sweet.